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Monday, July 6, 2009

Why is my baby's poo yellow

OK, so this is really not the normal area of conversation in this blog... well any of my blogs, to be quite honest. The thing is, this question, well more of a commentary came to me by the way of a friend who just squirted out a third child. Of course the parents are used to the various colours of Child Guano, however, units 1 and 2 were less versed in the ways of the bum hole





Of course my first response was "Because he is an Alien." "From the planet mamakootchie" I went on in a further email. The thing is, I'm sure many first time parents are asking the very same question "WHY IS MY BABY'S POO YELLOW" Some may say "WHY IS MY BABY'S POOP YELLOW" while others may even refer to poop by its' proper Anglo-Saxxon name "Shit".

So being the socially conscious blogger on a quest for the meaning of life the universe and everything beyond 42, I decided to do a little searching on the healthy colours of Alien Crap. As it turns out, Yellow baby Poo is completely normal. Apparently it is quite natural for infants to have yellow poo, particularly when they are on a purely milk based diet. So the quick answer Yes it is perfectly healthy if your baby's poo is yellow. On the other hand, it is not healthy, nor normal to have Yellow poo, either cooked or raw.

Now Greed poo, that is a completely different story. (continued. Below)







If your child is shitting green, you better start searching your significant other for the marks of an Alien. Perhaps he or she greets friends with a friendly "NaNoo NaNoo" and drink milk through their finger.


Maybe they have a long nose and are covered in hair and have an obsession for eating cats (Not to be confused with a hairy chinese person). Perhaps he/she has multiple heads (Although I don't know how you could have missed that prior to fvcking them.. or maybe you just like that kind of thing - I'm not judging - Freak!!! :P)

Truth be know, if your baby does have green poo, some chick on the internet says:

"If your baby's stools are green and frothy she may be taking in too much lactose (the natural sugar found in milk), which happens if she feeds often, but doesn't get the rich milk at the end of the feed to fill her up. It may also be caused by overfeeding or underfeeding, or is a sign that your baby has a stomach bug."


So now you know. Now won't you be able to sleep better at night. Remember what your mama told you "Don't eat Yellow Poo!!!"

Oh ya, one last minute thought. Apparently Freud said it is "Perfectly Normal for Children to be obsessed with poo." Adults... well that is another story. Take your Skat fantasies elsewhere you freaks.





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